Man plans god laughs. That I don't believe in god must make it really easy for me to plan, work, execute and accomplish. Or so I'd wish it to be like. Fact is I never planned so I never worked towards anything never executed things and as it would end up never accomplished. Question: do all go fearing/ believing people deliberate while planning (assuming they all plan) because they k or god will laugh and not make it happen. Do the fearing/ believing planners plan and hope to end up half way or somewhere close even if their god had to laugh on it. Don't they have a way to cheat the laughing unknown entity by planning ahead of what they want to achieve and then end up with what they want by almost making it. Forget it. Talking about belief I already believing I've lost it. If you are thinking I'm talking out of my ass and that im showing early signs of old age depression; let me tell you this is purely mid life crisis. 31 is not an age where you are getting any younger and for a person like me I can't even remember what I wanted to do/ be at this age according to my plans when I was 13 because I frankly didn't have a plan when I was 13. Not that I have one now. It kinda sucks when I say it that way and doesn't speak volumes about me or the way I am living my life. I say living because I am still not planning my life. Question is should it be that way? Well no one plans life because it is not a week long or a diet ( which for me would have lasted that long too). People don't plan lives they set benchmarks in life and work towards them. I never did that because I thought I'd enjoy the journey stumbling upon these benchmarks in life and having all the fun on the way which others might miss out on in their quests. Problem is I don't remember much of the fun I had or the benchmarks I stumbled upon in the way, or whether or not I did either one of them. Is ambition the true mark of a person in this world. Is it the definition of every persons character and they way they conduct themselves or work their way around life? Where is the line between ambitious and over ambitious. Are normals an anomaly? Or is normal ambitious. I don't even know if I have been ambitious or what people have written about me in their books because of what they saw. Not that I care but I care about the name I have on someone else's phone book. I guess I could blame it to a phenomenon called the generation gap but yeah I see that it is not really the case. I see 20 something's, 30 something's, 40-50 something's running gunning for something. I feel like I don't have anything to run for. Life's not bad so far and I'm not complaining. There is nothing is do differently thus far but what will it be here on. Do I need a goal to make the next 30 or till the time I hit the bucket/ bottle/ mug/ glass. Am I needed to feel bad about not having a plan in life. Why do people have a plan so they can make more and then work towards them and them more and more. Where's life in that. Plans to achieve and then marry and then plan for a better life then kids and their lives. I'm anyways not up for all of that jazz so do I still need a plan. I would like to not plan and be able to give up all work and responsibilities and move away for a few months. Can that be a plan or is that escapism. I don't know what is for real and what's not. Frankly at 31 I still can differentiate right from wrong at most times, but I know when to trust my gut and a plan would kill that instinct. Life may suck or not that much but yeah I can't make it worse for me walking the line. It's different for different people and I start drawing parallels I think I might end up being a bigger retard than what I already sound like. Options will be made and thoughts will build up, but a mans gotta do what a mans gotta do. So much for my first post without an image or an abuse. That's a plan. Till then

For a world that had a pre-paid plan

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